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When I first decided to lose weight, I thought it was all diet.

"80% of all weight loss is diet" is what most people would tell me.

So, if I could find the right foods and the best diet, I'd be able to get lean easily and effortlessly.

But the problem was even though I'd lose 20+ lbs, I'd always put it back on in a matter of months.

After cycles of gaining weight and losing, I knew there was something wrong.

Part of the problem was the diets I was following and ​my ignorance of how the body adapts when it loses weight.

The other problem was my psychology.

There are many pitfalls to getting in shape, but none are more insidious than our minds.

For me, it wasn't enough to do a diet. I had to fix the mental hangups I had around food so I could lose the weight once and for all.

So, in today's article, I will share the psychology behind why you can't stick to a diet and what you can do about it.

The Psychology of Why People Can't Stick to a Diet (and What to Do About It)

Sunlight is the best disinfectant, and awareness is your mental tool for weight loss. As you go through these, note which ones you struggle with the most.

Psychological Barrier #1: All Or Nothing Thinking

Many dieters engage in black-and-white thinking about food. They see themselves as either "on or off" a diet and label foods as "good or bad."

If people don't stick to a diet they can see it as a failure and this mindset can lead to feelings of guilt or shame.

Psychological Barrier #2: Emotional Eating

Many people use food to cope with emotions like stress, anxiety, boredom, or depression.

There's an emotion that is not being tended to, and it rears its ugly head at certain times of the day.

Psychological Barrier #3: Deprivation Mindset

Diets that remove entire food groups or eat super low calories can create a sense of deprivation.

This can lead to feeling intense cravings and even a mental obsession with foods they "can't" eat.

This creates resentment toward the diet and sometimes the dieter.

Psychological Barrier #4: Lack of Intrinsic Motivation

When you diet for external reasons (ie. looking good to others) you're less likely to stick with the diet long term.

You need to have a strong WHY to bear any HOW.

Psychological Barrier #5: Unrealistic Expectations

Most people who want to lose weight are too ambitious with their goals and the speed to achieve them.

When these expectations are not met, it can lead to discouragement and a loss of motivation.

Psychological Barrier #6: Negative Body Image

Poor body image and lack of self-esteem create a destructive cycle:

1. You diet to improve body image
2. You feel like a failure when you can't stick to your diet
3. You end up eating your emotions or feeling like a failure after not sticking to the diet
4. You go back to #1

People will keep on doing this cycle until they figure it out or give up.

Psychological Barrier #7: Social Group and Environment

You are the average of the five people you hang around the most, which goes for your eating habits too.

Also, food temptation is a real thing. If you have foods that veer you off course, staring you in the face all day, you will most likely eat them.

How to Overcome Psychological Barriers

Based on what you struggled with, use this list as a toolbox to overcome your biggest mental hurdle.

1. Set a longer time horizon for your body

The goal for sustainable weight loss is NOT speed; it's direction. So give yourself a long time horizon and give yourself permission to make mistakes.

In my experience, it takes 4-6 months to lose weight and 1-1.5 years to create a lifestyle. This takes the pressure off you and hones you in for the long game.

2. Focus on gradual, sustainable changes over drastic restrictions

Don't look for fast results.

Instead, choose options that allow you to eat and drink in the way you love (in moderation) that you can see yourself doing for a lifetime.

3. Address emotional eating through journaling or therapy

Get to the root of why you eat to numb certain emotions.

Find out where it came from then do the work to heal the wounds around it.

4. Practice mindful eating

Next time you eat a meal put the phone down and focus on your meal.

This helps you better understand your physical cues for hunger and fullness.

5. Find your anchor

Get clear on your WHY as this will be your mental fuel on your journey to get healthy.

Sure, you want to look great in front of others, but why do you want to do this? Get clear on that, and you'll be motivated if/when shit hits the fan.

6. Be grateful for your body and what it can do

Instead of criticizing your body for what it's not, try appreciating it for what it can do.

Write out 3-5 things you're grateful for about your body every day. This will help you amplify your appreciation.

Then, use the mental gym concept I revealed in this article to change your self-image to be one that supports you.

7. Fix your environment and social network

Remove any and all things that can create food temptation in your environment.

Get clear on who you want to surround yourself with, and look hard at your friend group to see which ones influence you to eat or drink in certain ways.

8. Get help and accountability

Consider working with our private coaching program to help you lose weight in an effective and sustainable way.

You must change the mind to change the body

Many factors influence your psychology around dieting.

Chances are, if you struggle with sticking to a diet, you're dealing with more than one of these.

Also, if you suffer from any of these, it doesn't represent a moral failure on your part. It's part of being human in the modern world.

So, as you went through this list, which stood out most? Note that down.

Congrats, you've taken a step 99% of people who fail diets never take:

You have an awareness of what holds you back and the tools to heal it.

Btw free to share with me the biggest thing you're struggling with by replying to this email. I read all emails and would love to hear what you've learned.

Onwards and upwards 🚀

Dan Go
Founder of Dan Go Fitness Coaching ← if you want to transform your body, check this out

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References

1. Todd, P. M., & Mata, J. (2010). Perceived diet plan complexity is associated with increased risk of abandonment. Appetite, 54(1), 37-41.
2. Freedhoff, Y. (2014). The Diet Fix: Why Diets Fail and How to Make Yours Work. Random House Canada.
3. Institute for the Psychology of Eating. (2014). Why Diets Don't Work: The Biological Reasons.
4. Polivy, J., & Herman, C. P. (1985). Dieting and binging: A causal analysis. American Psychologist, 40(2), 193-201.
5. Chrzan, J., & Cargill, K. (2021). Anxious Eaters: Why We Fall for Fad Diets. Columbia University Press.

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